Butcher Pete

The soundtrack to Fallout 3 is pretty amazing, but the song “Butcher Pete” made me immediately stop playing and listen to the entire thing. I had heard of Roy Brown before but I had never heard him sing “Butcher Pete.” I was enthralled by it. It was stuck in my head for days. In Fallout 3 the song mentions there is more to the story/song, but GNR doesn’t play it. I had to look for both parts. I needed to hear the full song.

Here are both parts of “Butcher Pete”. The other strange thing about the songs is that the more I listened to it, the more I was sure that I had heard it before.

The Cramps actually covered it in 2003. Now I’m a big fan of the Cramps. I liked their version of the song, but now that I’ve heard Roy Brown’s version, the cover just pales in comparison. Still it is an interesting take on the song.

Alice Cooper and Halloween Horror Nights

You become pretty numb to theme parks when you grow up in Orlando. Every once in a while there is an announcement that gets you excited. Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Studios is always interesting and some of their themes can be pretty fun. This year they’ve already announced house based on the Walking Dead and on the video game series Silent Hill. Now they’ve announced a house based on Alice Cooper.

The Orlando Universal studios are going to have a house called Alice Cooper’s Welcome to My Nightmare. The Halloween Horror Night’s website describes it like this: “Journey into legendary rocker Alice Cooper’s twisted mind and witness the natural melding of horror and Cooper’s four decades-long career. Here you will follow Steven, the iconic character from many of Cooper’s works, as you come face to face with a myriad of tormentors who threaten an already-decaying sense of sanity.”

Last year the Los Angeles Horror Nights already had an Alice Cooper house. So it sounds like Orlando is getting a version of that one. Los Angeles is getting a new Cooper maze this year called Alice Cooper Goes to Hell. I’ve been an fan of Alice Cooper since middle school. I’m thrilled that such an horror themed entertainer is still going strong. This kind of news just makes me happy.

F’ing Vacation

No Hangover Thursday today, That F’ing Monkey is going on vacation! Brandon and I are on our way to the home of deep dish pizza and Italian Beef sandwiches. The site will be updated Friday (It’s a non-Flash Friday) and Saturday, but after that don’t expect anything new until Wednesday.

On Saturday we’ll be at Games Day checking out all the Warhammer-ness that is going on there. If you’re going to Games Day, make sure you let us know. Next week I’m sure we’ll be sharing all the highlights of the convention.

Mako Up Close

Guy Harvey is a well know wildlife artist and conservationist. While he was filming a blue marlin he got surprised by a giant mako shark. Make sure you have your speakers on for this one, the audio alone is worth it.

I love how the mako turns its head to look at him. It’s an absolutely beautiful shark. I don’t think I’ve ever seen another video that properly showed just how fact the mako is. This video nails it. Harvey estimates that the shark was around 10 feet long and 600 pounds.

Shark Week is coming soon and after reading some of the new shows coming I’m saddened to say that from what I’ve seen announced it looks like it is going to be another great white fest. The above video shows that a shark doesn’t have to be a great white to me interesting. I’m still hoping Discovery will be showing us lots of tiger, mako, and hammer heads; but I think we’ll just get jumping great whites again. Jumping great whites are exciting, but there are other fish in the sea.

Warhammer 40K: Play Report

We talked about the release of Warhammer 40K’s sixth edition, but I haven’t really talked about it since. One of the reasons for that is that I haven’t had a chance to purchase the rule book yet. I knew it was coming, so I really should have planned better. I just haven’t had the disposable income to pick one up. That did not stop me from getting to my local Games Workshop store this weekend and playing my in two small point value games. But would I even like the new rules?

The first game I played was a one on one match against a Space Wolf player. He hadn’t really played many games of sixth edition either, so we both knew we’d be looking lots of things up while playing. It was a friendly relaxed game of war in the grim dark future. To get the technical stuff out of the way, we each had 700 points of figures. We played a three objective game with hammer and anvil deployment. I was using my Salamanders and my opponent was playing Space Wolves.

I had a blast. The new random objective powers turned out to be useful in two of the three situations. The random power I picked up from the Warlord traits actually came in handy at one point in the game. Shooting at buildings is fun, although my multi-melta was too far away to do serious damage to the tower. During the first two rounds of the game I really thought I was going to lose. I managed to turn it around though and my opponent conceded at the midpoint of turn five. I think my Captain challenging and killing Njal Stormcaller was the highpoint of the game for me.

Our next game was a three way capture the flag battle. Both the Space Wolf player and I re-used the armies we had just played with. Our third player was a fantasy player who was jumping into 40K with a Grey Knight army. Since no one was really familiar with the Grey Knight rules, we messed them up pretty badly. We gave the Grey Knights a pretty big power boost that they don’t really have. The Grey Knight player won that game, but had we actually used the rules correctly it could have been anyone’s game. In the end, we all had fun though, so that was what mattered to us.

Brandon and I will both be up at Games Day this weekend, so I’d expect a full write up on that sometime next week.

Aquabro

I am working on battening down the hatches at work and prepping to hit up Chi-Town for Games Workshop's Mini-Con Games Day this weekend. So yet another quick post today. But it is pretty awesome. Check it...

 

The Journey of Thall Faceshooter, Part 2

I’ve been buried in overtime this week, but somehow I still managed to put some time in to playing Fallout 3. Thall continues to search for his father and has become a bit of a white knight; except for that whole shooting people in the face thing. What follows are my notes and thoughts on what was happening. If you’re like me and it took you 4 years to get around to playing Fallout 3 there are some spoilers below.

Searching for a group of wanna be vampires called the Family. When I find the man they have guarding the entrance he quickly threatens me, opens the gate so I can come in, and then wanders over to a cot and falls asleep.

If only I was taking video, I could have started a new internet phenomenon: 3 vicious dogs, 1 grenade.

Killing raiders with a grenade only to find a brand new grenade on them when you loot the body; it feels pretty good.

Can you tell I like grenades?

I spend a lot of time in bars.  It's kind of like real life.

I walked out of a door only to have a mercenary group attack me for doing good deeds. Didn’t they realize all my good deeds involved shooting people in the face? So I shot them in the face.

Found a robot on the toilet. Apparently he’s finished because his status shows as empty.

In the robot factory I reprogrammed the robots to destroy all the giant mole rats and rad-roaches. I forgot to tell the robots not to attack me. Ouch.

Saw a caravan trader. He ran like crazy with his guard running after him. Finally caught up to him and he was happy to trade. It was like he totally forgot about running around like a chicken with its head cut off for 5 minutes.

I found a building full of Super Mutants. I snipe one of the second floor. I start ambushing the rest with my trusty combat shotgun. Eight more Super Mutants lose their faces. The ninth is up on the second floor yelling about how I’m scared. I tried to be intimidated, but standing knee deep in dead Super Mutant made me feel like a bad ass.

I meet the radio DJ 3 Dog. Unlike most current day DJs 3 Dog doesn’t look fat, balding, or far older than he sounds on the radio. I find this the most unrealistic thing in the game.

Two get to 3 Dog I had to cross a plaza where Super Mutants and the Brotherhood of Steel are fighting. I lay a trap. Landmines are set up, I snipe one Super Mutant, and the whole group come running for me. The four landmines blow up, I throw a grenade into the mix, and only body parts are left. Later 3 Dog tells me that the Brotherhood saved my skin out there. He doesn’t know how close he came to a face shooting.

I come back home to Megaton city to sell some stuff and stretch out on my bed. An adoring town’s person runs up to hand me some snack cakes to thank me for doing what I do (face shooting evil). I accept the cakes…and I’m over encumbered. Fuck.

Flash Friday: Villain Spotlight: Double Down

Happy Flash Friday everyone! The new 52 has made a number of changes to the Flash’s Rogues. I won’t say that I’m thrilled about these changes but I’m not really willing to get into that discussion right now. Instead I want to give some of the lesser villains a bit of the spotlight. Those evil doers forever banished to the back of overcrowded group scenes to make the villains seem more numerous. Today we’re talking about Double Down.

The Double Down is a sandwich at KFC. See instead of bread they just give you two chicken patties. Then they shove cheese and bacon in between the two pieces of chicken. Get it, two pieces of chicken? So it’s double the chicken of a normal chicken sandwich. Double Down! Yeah, okay I ran that one into the ground.

Double Down was actually one of the new villains introduced in the story Iron Heights. His real name is Jeremy Tell; a con artist and gambler who murdered another gambler one night after losing all his money. A cursed deck of cards flew out of the dead gamblers possessions and fused with Tell’s skin. Tell can now control the cards which can be razor sharp.

Double Down has never gotten his own story. He is always a joiner of some sort. He’s worked for Waller, Penguin, Joker, and the Top. When you’re used as a foot soldier in a story you’re never going to get any time to really shine. His cards have been shown being able to hurt Superman, so they are probably magical in nature. Years ago I was told that Double Down was homosexual. He hasn’t received enough story time in the comics for that to be addressed, so I doubt you’ll ever see it mentioned.

Since Double Down doesn’t really have a history that needs updated or retconned I figure he’ll show up the next time someone needs to use a bunch of lower tiered super villains. It’s a shame too; most villains have at least one issue or two to look menacing before they’re demoted to filler. So today is dedicated to Double Down. Also if someone with artistic talent wants to draw Double Down eating a Double Down, I will be forever in your debt.

Hangover Thursday: New Stouts

It’s Hangover Thursday, how’s your head? I’m feeling pretty good but it was still difficult to get out of bed this morning. I was introduced to two stouts last night and I went home with a belly full of them. I wish you could have all been there with me, but since you weren’t I guess I’ll just have to tell you about them.

The first I had was Porterhouse Brewery’s Wrasslers Full Stout. Wrasslers is an Irish stout, made in Ireland, and they want you to know it is based on an old Cork recipe that Michael Collins used to drink. I wasn’t running around during Ireland during the 1920s so I can’t confirm that last part, I can confirm that Wrasslers is an excellent stout. It’s a flavorful stout, but I didn’t find the bitterness overpowering. I had two of them and was ready to head home early when the next beer happened.

As I’m saying I’m going to leave my friendly bartender says, “Have you tried the Crème Brulee yet?” I laugh; there is no way I’m going to enjoy a beer called Crème Brulee. He comes back with a sample. It smells like candy, it tastes like candy. The alcohol taste comes after that initial sugar rush. Oh my god, I like a beer called Crème Brulee. Crème Brulee is actually an Imperial Stout from Southern Tier Brewing Company. I’ve mentioned them before; they are the brewers who make the Mokah stout I’m so in love with.

The Crème Brulee is an Imperial Stout, so it came with an Imperial ABV. 9.60% compared to Wrasslers 5%. It was also on tap, so I knew it wouldn’t last long. After I finished the first glass I had to order a second. If you run into either of these stouts in your journeys you should try them for yourself.

Dirty Laundry

I know a number of Punisher fans. The most diehard one I know loves the movie starring Thomas Jane. I keep trying to sing the praises of Dolph Lundgren but he won’t listen. It’s going to be even harder to convince him that Thomas Jane isn’t the perfect Frank Castle now that Dirty Laundry has been released. I almost saved this for Hangover Thursday. You’ll see why once you watch this amazing movie.

I want a full length version now. As for why this exists, this is what Thomas Jane had to say. "I wanted to make a fan film for a character I've always loved and believed in - a love letter to Frank Castle & his fans. It was an incredible experience with everyone on the project throwing in their time just for the fun of it. It's been a blast to be a part of from start to finish -- we hope the friends of Frank enjoy watching it as much as we did making it."

Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater HD

Every once in a while a video game comes and out and regardless of its subject matter, just pulls people to it. 1999’s Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater was one of those games. I didn’t really care about skateboarding at the time, but when that game came out I spent hours and hours grinding out tricks. I wasn’t the only one; the Tony Hawk franchise of games was huge when it started. That magic is coming to Xbox Live tomorrow and it looks amazing.

Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater HD is brining all the fun of the first two games but with an improved engine and better graphics. You’ll still be trying to get high scores on each level. You’ll still have to collect the letters to spell “SKATE”. Updating the game with the times, you’ll also have DVDs to collect.

The levels will be familiar to those who played the first two games. The Hanger is the big one for me; I spent so much time on that level it wasn’t funny. Some of the other returning levels are the Mall, the Warehouse, School 2, Marseille, Downhill Jam, and Venice Beach. The skater list and the soundtrack will both combine new and old entries. Secret characters are confirmed. I hope Spiderman is one of them, he was spectacular.

Ultimate Weapon

So while moving last week I came across something that I had forgotten about...

That's right folks...The Death Blow. What is the Death Blow do I hear you say?

Well it is the greatest weapon ever conceived, a knife with a blow gun attached. Let me say that again, A KNIFE WITH A BLOW GUN RIGHT IN THE HANDLE!! Damn right. Let's take a closer look shall we?

Bam! In the handle!

It comes out and you have long range death! Pure convenient death.


Okay, seriously this thing was an impulse buy at a DragonCon one year. If you have ever been to a Con you know that there are numerous weapons dealers scattered about and you can buy just about anything. As our little group (of which Ken was a part of) walked by this little gem we all stopped. Then we all bought one. They apparently were selling like hot cakes (blow gun in the handle!!) so we had to have them shipped to us after the Con. We talked about the ol' Death Blow for most of the Con and it became a bit of a running joke for a while. Then like most things it faded into history, but now it is back...and better than ever! KNIFE WITH A BLOW GUN IN THE DAMN HANDLE!! Can one get better than that?


As always Let Your F'ing Voice Be Heard! In the comments, our Facebook or on the Contact Us button. Tell us how much you love the Death Blow or your own favorite Con weapon ever (it's the Death Blow I know...)

The Journey of Thall Faceshooter, Part 1

We’re going to try something a little different here at That F’ing Monkey. Fallout 3 was released in 2008 to rave reviews. Even though I wanted to, I never got around to playing it. Luckily for me I wound up in a situation where I have some free time and a shortage of money for video games. Luckily Fallout’s Game of the Year edition contains all of the games DLC and only cost 20 dollars. I’m going to be discussing my play through below, so there are spoilers for a 4 year old game below. You’ve been warned.

The game starts with your birth and then you’re dropped into the character creator. I spend a lot of time in character creators and this one was no different. When I got to hair styles I saw one that struck an old memory. Suddenly my whole idea for playing had changed. I had to go back and start the character creator over but I was going to play the Fallout version of Thall Joben. Thall was a character from the old Star Wars Droids cartoon.

Day One of Playing:

Took the GOAT (General Occupational Aptitude Test) and got placed as the Vault’s tattoo artist! I actually got this result without looking at a guide. I was pretty psyched.

Hmm. I don’t think I can actually get tattoos. I suddenly want a mini-game where I ink people. None of that happens.

Guards are after me. I turn the corner to see a guard getting attacked by rad-roaches. Trying to be heroic I shoot the rad roaches out of the air. Even after saving his life, the guard comes after me.

Still trying to be the good guy, I want to disable the guard not kill him. I put a bullet in each leg. He dies anyway. From now on I’ll just shoot them in the face.

Escaped the Vault, headed to the first town.

Shady wants me to blow up the town. I tell the sheriff and the sheriff confronts Shady. Shady shoots the sheriff in the back. I shoot Shady 7 times in the face before he dies. Holy fuck bullets either got really weak in the future or people’s skulls got really dense.

The sheriff’s kid runs in and tells me he’ll still pay me if I disarm the bomb in town. He doesn’t seem to care that I’m wearing his dad’s duster and cowboy hat. He also doesn’t seem to care that his dad is lying on the floor dead, wearing nothing but boxer shorts.

After playing for a couple of hours I finally figured out how to turn on my flashlight. Fuck.

Day Two of Playing:

Met with Crazy. She wants me to go to the supermarket. There are ghouls hanging out in front of the place. My first instinct is to shoot them in the face. Instead we talk around their hobo fire for a few minutes. Once inside the supermarket I shoot a bunch of Raiders in their faces.

Back in town I have some money finally. Meet the local prostitute. I consider her services, but she would pretty much cost me half of my savings. Maybe I’ll put a little aside after each mission A layway for a lay, it seems appropriate.

Crazy sends me out into a mine field. Ran into some more Raiders. Shot them in the face.

Beep beep beep booom! Oh god my arm is crippled! Found the mine field.

Slept in an abandoned house after looting it. The owners’ skeletons are in there, they’ve been long dead. There is a dead Raider in the living room though. He looks fresh. No idea what killed him. Slept in the house anyway, it was creepy as fuck though.

Gave Crazy a landmine I got out of the supermarket and told her it came from the minefield. Fuck her.

That’s it for the first two nights I got to sit down with the game. There may be more adventures of Thall Faceshooter next week.

Flash Friday: Funko Pop Returns

Happy Flash Friday everyone! Way back in December 2010 I wrote about the Funko Pop vinyl Flash. At the time it came out the Funko Pop line was pretty small. Now they are all over the place which huge comic, movie, television, and music licenses. I still really like the Pop design, apparently other people do too because the Pop DC characters are showing up in things other than plush and vinyl figures.

I’ve never been a fan of baseball hats. It’s not that I don’t like the look of them; I could never find one that was comfortable to me. It got even worse once I started shaving my head. The Pop Flash hat did turn out pretty nice looking though. It makes me almost want to buy it, but I’ve been down that path before. I get it, put it on once, and then never wear it again.

The Pop Flash can be worn in shirt form. I normally steer away from shirts with the character on the shirt. My preference for simple logos over people is all over past Fridays. Just like the hat though, I think the simple design of the Pop figures works really well on a shirt.

Finally, the most recent release form Funko. The Pop Flash Lanyard. The lanyard itself has alternating Pop Flash heads and Flash symbols. At the end of the lanyard is a tiny charm of the Flash’s head. It could be the perfect thing for your next convention. I just got an awesome lanyard from another of my obsessions recently or I’d be ordering this one right now.

That’s it for now, but with the way Funko is pushing the Pop line I’m sure we’ll see those black eyes staring at us from all sorts of new products soon.

Hangover Thursday: Whiskey Drives Me Crazy

It’s Hangover Thursday, how’s your head? I had a chance to catch up on some much needed sleep last night and I actually chose that over my Wednesday trip to the bar. But fear not faithful readers and I’ll be catching up on my drinking very soon. I’ve been getting pretty slammed at work lately; putting in lots of overtime and such. All I’ve been thinking about lately is a couple shots of Jameson. So in honor of that, here is a wonderful tune by the Tossers about whiskey.

If you ever see that the Tossers are playing in your town, make sure you catch their show. Besides being an amazing band, they are a whole lot of fun to drink with. One day I’ll have to tell the story how I ended up drinking with their lead singer that night after my wedding. And don’t worry about me, I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to find my way to a shot glass this weekend.

Pizza Cones

It may be a little outside our wheelhouse, but today That F’ing Monkey is talking pizza. Chicago stuffed pizza, giant slices New York style, pan pizza, thin and crispy; I’m pretty much a fan of it all. Lately Pizza Hut seems to be throwing pizza toppings on everything they can find. Last month they put out high class Hot Pockets, this month their covering slices of garlic bread in pizza toppings. To my knowledge they’ve never offered a pizza cone.

The Pizzacraft PC0304 Pizza Cone set will give you the tools to make 6 pizza cones. Just look at that picture. I get hungry every time I see it. I’m sure cooking them is a little tricky, you don’t want to burn the outside but you have to make sure the center is fully cooked. Imagine your friend invites you over for pizza and then you get that on your plate.

The 6 cone kit from Pizzacraft currently goes for 25 dollars. I’m not the only one who thinks this is an amazing deal though; as of this writing Amazon is temporarily out of stock. If you’re determined to have pizza cones I’m sure you’ll be able to find them on sale elsewhere. If you do track them down, let us know how they turn out.

G1 Van Upgrade

I was talking with a friend this weekend about how we were pretty much the perfect age when Transformers came out. I can still remember the first time I saw them on the store shelves. I also remember watching the cartoon when it premiered. Even at a pretty young age I was aware that not all of the toys looked like their cartoon counterparts. The biggest two examples were Iron Hide and Ratchet.

Iron Hide and Ratchet were pretty much one toy with two different paint schemes and minor kibble to make them different. Ratchet was the medic and Iron Hide was the blue collar soldier that was always at Prime’s right hand. They were big, burly looking bots that were always on the cartoon. Their toys were…well they were special. Their heads were stickers. The tops of the vans turned into the sled type vehicle. They were not what the cartoon was showing us.

Over the years there have been a number of new versions of Iron Hide and Ratchet, but I think iGear is about to release my favorite ones. Now iGear is a third party manufacturer, so they are actually releasing PP05M Medic and PP05M Weapon Specialist. Third party Transformers are never cheap; these will cost almost 120 dollars a pieces. Each of the bots does come with a huge amount of extra tools and weapons.

I love that there is a market out there to provide fans with versions of characters that they want. I’ve had Fansproject’s version of Springer since he was released and I couldn’t be happier with the purchase. I was never a huge fan of Iron Hide or Ratchet, but if I was I’d be scraping up the cash for a pre-order.

Interruption of Service

I am in the middle of a move, with all the fun that involves. So no post again this week. Regular Cake Fuckin' updates return next week with something amazing that was found during the move....

Tales from the Brain Jar, #22

Queue the spooky music, rattle some chains, and get the wolf to howl…Tales from the Brain Jar is back! The journey through my brain jar themed sketch book continues. Andy Kuhn did this amazing Rex Mantooth sketch for me at the 2009 Megacon. Andy’s name is usually associated with the comic Firebreather. He has been working with IDW on their TMNT series. He also provided the art for the subject of today’s sketch, Rex Mantooth.

The Annotated Rex Mantooth is the funniest comic I’ve ever read. The trade paperback consists of three stories. On the left of each page is the annotated script for that page. There are countless intros at the sart of the book.  This is the kind of treatment meant for a literary greatness. That’s the joke; Rex Mantooth shared three issues with another comic. It’s a kung fu gorilla super spy who spouts obscenities and saves the world. It shouldn’t have fully annotated scripts, but it does, and it makes the whole thing even better.

A lot of times when I get a sketch done, I already have a good idea of how I want the brain jar included. With my Starman, I knew it had to be a tattoo. On Jonah Hex, it had to be a wanted poster. I had no idea how to involve a brain jar with Rex. There is no Sergeant Brain Jar in the comics; it all came from Andy’s head. I sincerely hope that we’ll see more Rex Mantooth someday. Deep down I hope that appearance will include Sergeant Brain Jar.

Flash Friday: Little League

Happy Flash Friday everyone! Saturday I was surprised by how many people hadn’t seen the video for “The Star Wars that I Used to Know.” So today I’m going to be talking about a web comic that I hope most people are already reading. Little League by Yale Stewart is pretty much my favorite thing about the DC characters right now. I can’t remember the last time I anticipated a DC comic as much as I anticipate every new installment of Little League.

Little League takes place in an elementary school filled with heroes and villains. Batman and Superman are without a doubt the leads of the strip. The rest of the characters aren’t overlooked though. All of the other characters have had a chance to shine. Of course since this is Flash Friday, we have to talk about how Yale handles the Flash.

Little League’s Flash is a hyper, enthusiastic, and prone to yelling. He is fantastic. When the villains finally show up, Captain Cold was chosen from Flash’s Rogues. Len looks fantastic of course. He doesn’t get to do too much besides play muscle for Lex Luthor, but he does have one amazing moment that I won’t spoil here. If you love DC’s characters, you owe it to yourself to read Little League.

Hangover Thursday: Scientific Hangover Cures

It’s Hangover Thursday, how’s your head? Considering how many cookouts I knew about yesterday I’m willing to bet there are more than a few readers out there nursing a hangover today. A long time ago I stated my favorite Hangover cures were Orange Gatorade and a large Chicken Parmesan sub from Jersey Mikes. Something about that combo makes me feel better.

Check out the video AsapSCIENCE for a Scientific Hangover Cure. Even if it doesn’t actually help you, the soothing music might help your head.  Next week I think we're going to be talking about IPAs.

Assassin’s Creed 3 Independence

Happy 4th of July everyone! Hopefully you’re out enjoying the day. If you’re stuck at work and need something to do besides actual work; F’ing Monkey is here for you. In honor of the 4th Ubi Soft has released an “Independence” trailer for their upcoming game Assassin’s Creed 3.

I know there are tons of people that love them, but I’ve never gotten into the Assassin’s Creed series. Placing this one in the Revolutionary War does have me interested though. You will probably be hearing more about Assassin’s Creed 3 in the future.

Dungeon Village

I’ve had at least one game from developer Kairosoft on my phone since I bought my first iPhone years ago. The company makes simulation games that are simple enough to pick up easily but take a long time to master. The first game of theirs I ever played was Game Dev Pro, where you run your only game design studio. Dungeon Village came out last month, it took me a couple weeks to hear about it, but now I can’t stop playing it.

Despite being full of knights, dungeon dives, and monster slaying this is not a RPG. Instead you’re tasked with running a town that will attract adventurers. As your town becomes more popular new adventurers will start showing up. Just outside the town is where the adventures were face monsters. You can watch these battles, but the only way you can influence those battles is by supplying the adventurers with equipment and healing items.

Instead you’ll spend most your time picking what buildings to add, throwing events, and trying to meet the criteria to advance your town to the next level. Items you come across can be used to upgrade the visiting adventurers or your buildings. So you have to decide if you want your store to make more money or if you want your wizard to have more hit points. It’s a unique take on the fantasy setting and can be pretty addicting. It will cost you four dollars, but if you’re anything like me you’ll be spending hours on this one.