Cake Fucker: Origins

As we at That F'ing Monkey prepare for the one year anniversary of Comics, Games, and Booze we will be doing some retrospective and behind the scenes info this week. For my Monday post I shall be telling the story of the Cake Fucker nickname that I obtained many years ago at DragonCon. Not since Marvel delved into the history of that hairy Canuck have people questioned a backstory as much.


(Walter Langkowski opened a mystic barrier that allowed the Great Beast Tanaraq to pass through, and Walter assumed its form)

Anyway it all started in Atlanta, Georgia for DragonCon. Ken and I had gotten pledged into Lambda Sigma Rho by Tony DiGerolamo the writer for Superfrat. That day Ken became Brother Catacomb, the Brother that can summon and control Ray Harryhousen style skeletons.

And I became Brother X-wing. Wait, you ask yourself, I thought you were Brother Cake Fucker? Well settle down I am telling this story, stop interrupting!

That evening we were hanging out enjoying some frosty brews with the oft mentioned artist of Superfrat Chris Moreno. As we were getting nice and toasty another friend of ours, Glen, comes out of nowhere and begins to tell use all about a slice of cake as big as ones head "It's massive and fucking delicious", he says. Well I say "I want fucking cake!". Chris starts laughing his ass off and yells out "CAKE FUCKER!". Apparently he thought I said "I want to fuck cake". He then proceeds to ask if it is a birthday cake if I would blow out the candles first, how it works with an icecream cake, ect. Thus a nickname is born and has stuck ever since. To this day Glen still sends me pictures of DragonCon cake slices when I can't make it to the Con. I am also the only one to ever have his Frat name changed due to extreme hilarity.

For those that wonder, Brother Cake Fucker's super powers are comparable to Superman - as long as he is fucking a cake.

There ya go, the Origin of the Fucker of Cakes.

On a hockey note, the Lightning have tied up the Eastern Conference Finals with the Bruins at two games each. So you can expect a beard update from me next week.


Reading this week: "A Clash of Kings" by George R.R. Martin (I finally have some free time and am almost through it....)